Welcome to the Wasteland.

Vb hands on hips

The first thought to cross your mind was, “How the *F-CK did we end up here*!” You had just turned 15. Being a kid was the best. Lots of other kids to play with. Hell, you couldn’t count high enough to tell how many kids grew up with you. You had over 36 brothers and sisters, all but 1 is younger and you came from a small family. Mom was ALWAYS pregnant. Dad said it was something in the water.

Growing up was good. You got at least 1 to 2 meals a day, and at least once a week you got to sleep on a mattress. Sure it wasn’t as nice as a bed, but hey, only the adults got to sleep in a bed. School was voluntary. There weren’t enough desks or teachers anyway. But your folks made you go every day, so you would be smart to find “The Solution”.

Adults talked about “The Solution”. It seemed to be very important to all of them, butt women spoke of it the most. They were so tired hey said, and “The Solution” would fix everything. Soon you were 10. An grown up. School looked a lot better when your only other choice was to work making S.C.O.P.


S.C.O.P. stood for Scientifically Created Organic Protein. You learned that case you had S.C.O.P. for every meal, ever. Mom did what she could with it, S.C.O.P. loaf, S.C.O.P. burgers, S.C.O.P. patties, S.C.O.P. cakes. You could form it into a lot of shapes, but it always tasted the same. that’s S.C.O.P. and boy S.C.O.P. was good! Dad said thats cause it’s made with love, but thats seems silly.

Soon you turned 15 and it was time to take the G.O.A.T. That’s stands for Generalized Occupational Aptitude Test, and it would tell Vault 99’s Overseer what all the people would be best at. Last year my brother Alvin was chosen to become a barber since old Mr. Jangles, was getting on in years and sooner or later would need a replacement. Your folks were very happy about that. They hoped you would get a job necessary to the Vault so you could stay too.


It seemed to take forever but eventually they were posted, and Dad brought the results home. He looked very sad when he got home. Mom started crying and she didn’t even look at the results. Well you grabbed the print out, found your name and looked across to see the result.

It said one word; “Seeker”. That was great! It meant you was going to be seeking “The Solution”, right! Well they explained that Scientists were doing that. That a “Seeker” was being sent outside the Vault. Dad said the Vault was full, and there wasn’t room, food, or water for any more, so you would have to leave.

That’s how the F-CK you got here…


Vt sign

Welcome to the Wasteland.

I land Drippy